Chapter 7: Out of my comfort zone

 (Due to writer’s block and holidays, I was unable to upload this blog on time. I still hope that you will continue to read my blog and enjoy this one as well. From now on, I will post my blog weekly on Sunday again. Enjoy)

When I woke up, I tried to recall the dream I just had. It wasn’t V.K. who I saw.. It was someone different. It was my grandmother from father’s side playing with my younger self in the kitchen.
My grandmother lives in the Netherlands and when I was around 7/9 years old, my grandmother regularly visited us in Suriname. She always stayed at our place and at my aunts. From playing board games together, telling me stories and walking from one place to another. I really enjoyed these times…being young with no worries and being spoiled by her. She also had this secret drink which she made us drink whenever we felt sick. The drink itself was super disgusting but we had to drink it and it somehow made us feel better hahah.

But times changed and due to different circumstances I lost contact with her. I never really knew how to feel about it but life happens and I somehow just went along with it. It bothered me at times but this fast dutch life was catching up and I never really had time to really stand still and reflect on my own life and the whole situation. Even though I tried at times, life here in the Netherlands doesn't really give me time to stand still….constantly setting goals and constantly being on the go. You are really being dragged through it all..

But will I be dragged all the time or will I take control of it?

Finally, I made the decision to go and speak with a psychologist. People back home always find it weird.. They think it’s for crazy people, which of course is not the case at all. It is really important to speak with someone professional every once in a while, but also someone outside of your inner circle, who can look at these things objectively. So I did.. talking about what I’m dealing with, how I want to carry it with me for the rest of my life and to know  the way forward. 

These sessions really helped me look at situations differently and even though it was hard, the advice to take as much rest as possible, really helped me! Dropping out of university was hard but I think it was one of the best ideas so far. A bit contradicting, but choosing for yourself is and will always be the best thing to do!
In this period I had no responsibilities, finally time to reflect on things and decide what it is that I really want to do in this life.
Do I want to take a gap year? Do I want to continue with another study program? Or maybe just go back to Suriname? or just follow my dreams and do things I always wanted to do?

One of these dreams was to become a flight attendant for a period of time. I really don’t know why I wanted to become a flight attendant specifically, but the aviation sector always fascinated me. My dream was to start off as a flight attendant and then move to a more commercial role within this sector.
Now that this came to mind, I remember a conversation about how I wanted my education career to look like, I said: First my bachelors then in between flight attendant and then a masters degree. It seems like all was falling into place, because suddenly (and I think that this is how social media works) I was getting these ads on my instagram about being a flight attendant. Weird right?
After some time it was more specific… ‘Qatar Airways is looking for Cabin Crew in The Netherlands’.
At the beginning I ignored that ad, because…me? in the middle east? Qatar? hmm… I don’t know.
After a couple of days the Qatar Airways ad was still popping on my Instagram feed.. Even after two weeks… that was really the moment when I thought…hmmm maybe someone is trying to give me a sign. I then opened the ad to see what the requirements were and when exactly the recruitment date was.

Hmmmm….Why not give it a try? It was luckily here in Amsterdam at a hotel. There were requirements such as clean shaved, suit and tie and a certain age and length for men. All Check!

The day of the event itself, I went there full prepared and on time. Arriving there, I received a name badge and went into a room full of people. I would say around 70 people.
I then moved to the back somewhere and waited for the event to start. I’m a person who first observes the room to see what is happening and then if it feels right I start to interact. As I mentioned, I’m quite shy and find it difficult to step towards people and start a conversation myself.
After some observation, you start seeing the extroverts and introverts, people who came together as a group and people who were just waiting patiently for the event to start. I always find it fascinating - these extroverts, just roaming around and talking to everyone - and if you ask me….sometimes doing just a little bit too much..But again, it’s just who they are.

After a while, the event started and two people from the airline came to brief all the people about how the day will look like. First we will have an intake and handover our resume and passport, then we move over to a test, which includes measurements (height etc) and competency test. We finish off with the group who is selected to fill in the necessary documents. 

When it comes to interviews, any job interview, I try to calm myself down by preparing really well for it but also to tell myself that I currently don’t have that role, so if I’m not selected I also don’t lose anything. Ofcourse I feel disappointed, but when I know I prepared well and still get declined….I know that that role/job is not for me. How frustrating it can be…it’s all written, meaning.. everything happens as it is supposed to happen.

Finally it was my turn.. Going into a room with two people from Qatar Airways… “Passport please?” I handed my passport and they are curiously looking at it…. “Where are you from?” I'm from Suriname, South America. The country above Brazil. “Ahhh interesting..never heard of it”. I started to explain a little bit. I must admit…In every interview people always find the country and my journey (moving from Suriname to the Netherlands) fascinating. I think it always positively helped me in getting a job. It’s also something I’m really proud of.

After some explanations I was handed a letter and the lady told me to come back at 11:00am (2 hours later) and that I shouldn’t tell anyone. Interesting…..
I then went home and returned at the agreed time. Arriving back at the venue, there were only 30 people left…With every step, the group became smaller by announcing the names of people who can stay and need to leave.

I think I made it to the last round…..With only six people left, we were then required to fill in several documents. Unsure what this means as we did not receive any (verbal) confirmation that we are hired… As we were finished with filling in all the documents, I went home and started telling my family and friends.
Once again, I didn't really know what it all means, but there might be a possibility that I’m hired and that I need to move to Qatar…

A weird, exciting and scary feeling. I didn’t really know how to feel about it. Especially moving to the Middle East with all these horror stories. But there was quite some time as the official hiring date would be 4 months from now.
Again… I really didn’t know what to do…I wanted this..but it’s quite scary and that’s also because it all lies out of my comfort zone..but the magic really happens outside of your comfort zone..
I decided to give it some rest and just go on with my daily activities. As I didn't have any responsibilities I decided to go to Suriname earlier and just spend some time with my family..

And now it comes.. At Schiphol..I was walking towards my gate and the moment I was able to see my gate and the aircraft of Surinam Airways, I noticed that the Qatar Airways aircraft was right next to my gate…..In Suriname itself…I was at my travel agent for a US visa and the moment I was sitting there, someone called the agent and asked how to apply for a visa for Qatar…….After some weeks I was in the USA with my bestfriend and as we were sitting by the pool talking about life…suddenly a Qatar Airways aircraft flies over….descending at Miami International Airport…. 

Tell me….. if these are not signs…. I really don't know WHAT IS… haha.

After some time, critical thinking, deep discussion…I made the decision to go and try it all out! Start a new life, clear my mind and just see what this new adventure has to offer me. Without risk, no story…And as I said..the magic really lies outside of the comfort zone.. It was finally time to really step out of it and really see what the world has to offer me, because we often play it safe, because we are scared but also because of societal pressure and standards….but is this really what makes us happy? I don’t think so…After several looks in the mirror… I knew that this was the right step for me...I was ready to find out who I really am, and to find the miracle the world was ready to show me. 

Curious to read my Blog of my Qatar journey?
Read my following blogs

1: The Price I paid to see the world (9 Chapters)
https://danielpitti.blogspot.com/2018/04/chapter-1-introduction.html

2: A Nightmare in Qatar (10 chapters)
https://anightmareinqatar.blogspot.com/2019/08/chapter-1-split-second-decision.html